it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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