Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You can't special order awesome
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Randomize
