Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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