Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
