so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
