is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
