just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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