didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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