ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
She bit a glass in half.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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