I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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