real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
