Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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