Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
