"it" just moved
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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