I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize