Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
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