im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
