thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
