So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
even my farts smell like vagina
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
