her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
