im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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