You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
