He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
