What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
