Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize