You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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