She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
people are starting to question the shark bite story
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
