'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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