All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
