dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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