i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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