You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Randomize
