someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
