I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
