at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
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