We're like a lot better than the average bears
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
