my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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