So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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