But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
