I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize