If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
