i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Just took my morning after pill in the library
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
