the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
