fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
