soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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