I hate your face
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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