I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
