first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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