it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
