found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
