This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
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