I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
