Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
